As I Lay Dying‘s divisive vocalist Tim Lambesis didn’t exactly have a peaceful November last year. With his metalcore band’s lineup once again disintegrating amid a mass exodus of bandmates, disturbing home security footage of him and his then wife leaked out. While Lambesis countered the matter with allegations of his own against his now ex-wife, his former bandmates would later go on to reveal the troubling details that led them to cut ties with him.
Since then, Tim has once again rebuilt and relaunched As I Lay Dying, this time with a completely revamped roster. As it so happens, November 21st is also Lambesis‘ birthday and the now 45-year-old musician, most infamously known for attempting to have his wife at the time murdered back in 2013 and ultimately going to prison for it, has reflected back on the strife and turmoil that engulfed him as he turned 44.
Speaking on social media today, November 24th, he stated:
“Last year’s birthday was the worst of my entire life.
I was carrying more anxiety and depression than I’d ever known — feeling trapped, threatened, and unsure if there was even a safe way to make the changes I desperately needed.
It was dark. And the thought of wishing I had never been born was something I wrestled with more than I’d ever admit.But facing that fear forced huge transformations in both my personal and professional life.
Slowly, the weight started to lift, and meaningful connection with the people closest to me began to give me life again.This year looks completely different.
I’m in a place where I genuinely appreciate — and feel appreciated by — the people around me.
There’s a deeper level of friendship in my life than I’ve ever known, and a sense of peace I’ve been missing for most of my life.I get to have weekly dinners with my whole family.
I fall asleep knowing my needs are met without having to plead, over-explain, or even ask.
That community lines up beautifully with the personal work I’ve been doing — sometimes alone, sometimes with the guidance of someone who really knows what they’re doing.And on top of that, I get to finish writing all the music I started earlier this year with a group of guys I’ve known for a long time — guys who took the time to understand me even more deeply when I was at my lowest.
They deserve to be part of the good things ahead.Thank you to everyone who reached out for my birthday.
I’m sorry for the slow replies — social anxiety still sneaks up on me, especially with the pressure of our phones — but your messages meant the world.
I felt loved. And I’m grateful.”
Thus far As I Lay Dying have issued a pair of new singles (“Echoes” & “If I Fall“) since unveiling their latest roster this fall. The group also completed a 20th anniversary tour for their third studio album “Shadows Are Security” in Europe.
