Singer Of Clown Attire Wearing Iron Maiden Tribute Band Arrested For Smuggling $7 Million Of Stimulants Into Japan


Daniel “Dicksee Diànno” Whitmore, frontman for the clown attire wearing Iron Maiden tribute band Powerclown was arrested on December 11th, 2017 for allegedly attempting to smuggle $7 million dollars worth of ‘stimulant drugs’ into Japan. The substance was found by authorities at the Narita International Airport within his guitar case and tea canisters.

The Vancouver, BC based musician will likely face serious jail time as Japan is not known for its tolerance when it comes to drug related cases. The band’s guitarist Sketchy Clown commented on the matter:

“In regards to certain legal actions taken against a certain member of one of my clients, Powerclown, I hereby release the following statement from the band.

Sincerely, Raymond Paip –
Attorney at Large.

Flags are flying half mast at the Powerclown circus tent. I assure you, any frowns we are wearing are real. Painted on or not. All we can do is hope for the best for him. Clownery and parlour tricks, whether by him or us ain’t gonna do no good. Even with his voice, the voice of a songbird, and his velvet-painting-smooth charm, he wont be able to talk his way out of these hijinks, even if he did speak Japanese.

While none of us clowns condone Dicksee‘s actions, or recommend anyone else attempting something this foolish, we do hope for the best for our grease-painted pal. We hope that by some small…make that large…miracle, he somehow manages to slide into his cock-pink pants and dance himself back home to face this different form of music he has created for himself. We love you Dicksee. If you somehow make it back here, and we hope you do, we may even go easy on you. Maybe. No promises.

Sketchy Klown filed the below video report on the matter: