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Melvins’ Buzz Osborne: “Rock Star Assholes Don’t Care About You”


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Melvins vocalist/guitarist Buzz Osborne continues to spit venom towards some of rock and roll’s elite. Speaking this time through the bands ongoing tour diary for Spin.com, Osborne went offf on the backlash they’ve faced following their recent comments on Rob Zombie, Green Day‘s Billie Joe Armstrong and more.

You can read an excerpt of his latest salvo below

“As a result of this SPIN tour blog we have actually had people asking us questions like how we could say such horrible things about these bloated, multimillionaire rock stars. And they always leave it off like at any moment we’re about to get dragged before some rock’n’roll kangaroo court to stand tall before the man and pay for our ungodly sins against these talented and humanitarian pillars of absolute rock’n’roll dignity.

Well clearly that should be the case, but let’s get real for a moment here: What’s Billie Joe Green Day or Rob Zombie or Bono going to do, not call us ever again? Are we going to be stricken from the rock’n’roll celebrity A-list as a result of these “outrageous” and pointless posted internet monstrosities? Will we receive absolutely no support from these people from now on as a result of actually having the balls to speak our mind in regards to this kind of bullshit?

Oh please, whatever they do to us don’t let it be that! I can’t imagine what it would be like to have to work and live our lives with no support from these blowhard, asshole bastard, multimillionaire talentless rock’n’roll idiots. If that happens I may as well just fold this whole thing up and call it quits! Come on. These senseless jackasses don’t care about me or what I think and I don’t really care what they think. Why would I?

There is not one thing I or any of the rest of you can learn from a millionaire rock star. Nothing. There is not one piece of information, not one bit of advice that they could ever lay on me that I could use in any area of my everyday life. I suppose they could put me in touch with a good divorce lawyer but that does me no good since I’m one of the few rock’n’rollers who’s been married only once and I’m nowhere near getting a divorce.

Of course they seem to know all about shit like getting divorced and surprisingly enough drug rehabs, but I don’t need assistance in those areas. I don’t need a coke dealer. I don’t need a divorce lawyer. I don’t need the number for a drug rehab. That seems to be the extent of the useful information they have to offer us lowly peons.

To be fair though, they do provide us all with an example of what not to do. I suppose there is some good in that, and I suppose that is important.

However….We’re talking about imbecilic five-star clowns with imbecilic five-star clown managers and road managers and an army of imbecilic five-star clown sycophant assholes surrounding them at all times and nothing they do ever surprises me. It’s predictably boring and pathetic and it’s one of the reasons the Melvins operate the way they do.

I can’t stand that fucking shit and I just don’t care. And besides, before you get mad at us for speaking our minds about this trivial bullshit, remember, these guys don’t want or need your help.

These rock star assholes don’t care about you. They don’t even care enough to try and make good music for their fans to listen to. What they generally care about has little or nothing to do with logic even because in most of these cases it’s not about money. These overpaid lazy fuckers already have more money than God. So what exactly is the motivation for these boring turds? I have no idea. Lord knows I can’t figure it out.

If I had to guess I’d say it has something to do with them liking having their asses kissed on and off stage all over the world. That’s what they miss the most when they aren’t “working.” On tour they get to strut around like Louis the XIV, but at home their just another pot smoking dipshit vegging out in front of a big screen cable TV. Wow. I remain unimpressed.

And I don’t mean to just pick on rich rock stars, my hatred in this department extends to all multimillionaire entertainers, be they comedians, TV personalities, news anchors, movie moguls, film directors, writers, artists, and actors, with actors being the lowest slime-crawling maggots of them all. Actors really are the scum of the earth.

Their behavior makes overpaid rock stars look positively noble. But that’s another diatribe. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t fault anyone for making money. I fault them for being boring, talentless, inhuman fuckheads.

“But come on, Buzz, aren’t you worried about going a little too far with this insane and seemingly pointless shit talking?”

No….Why should I be worried? When I do ponder such things I just think back to one of my favorite Flannery O’Connor quotes which is, “I’m not afraid that the book will be controversial, I’m afraid it will not be controversial.” Of course! I’m not worried about a goddamn thing. Now if I could somehow work it to where one of these multimillionaires takes a swing at me. Ha!”

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